the weekend

That was a pretty good weekend!!

-3d puzzle
-scattegories
-cranium
-pictionary
-lot’s of candy
-the opera
-tiffini coming up

good times

V7 vii7

An angered emotional freshman music major (no not me): “SINCE WHEN CAN A V7 CHORD MOVE TO A vii7, THAT IS REGRESSION AND WE CAN’T DO THAT”

what can i say except that i guess some people get really into their theory?

grr

i lay down in bed with lights off, computer away, and music off about midnight…. and it took me probably 3-4 hours to fall asleep

so now i’m skipping linear algebra because i’m already in a bad mood and that class just makes it worse

i can’t wait for the summer which for me will start on april 30

that’s…    35 school days, 7 weeks,196 hours of class, or 49 actual days,

at least this week is going fairly quickly, it’s already wednesday (an easy day) just one more day of hell (thursday i’m busy ALL DAY) then friday

thoughts

Do you ever just get those moments when you are really depressed and don’t really know why?

they suck

here are some of the thoughts running through my head, the are kind of random and shouldnt necisarily be taken in context with a previous thought

i can’t wait to live on my own, i think that that is truly when i will open up the rest of the way and be the real me

i dont understand how mom and dad fit in with society… in fact .. they really don’t

i can see now that at the very least ben and i will be close friends again, and there’s a good possibility of returning to what we once had, and i know i’m still in love with him… but how many more weeks/months/years am i going to waste if it doesnt work out in the long run…  i mean i can’t wait around forever… it’s not healthy

i really need to lose weight

i can’t wait to be financially independent, i hate when my parents give me money

i wish that i read as much as i used to

will mom and dad ever let megan go

what would life be like for me and megan if we had been raised by different parents

i know i’m going to be an excelent band director, but i also know that i dont want to live in shadow, hiding my partner from my future coworkers… is being open about that going to be a major hassle as a high school teacher?

i’m just stuck waiting again, not the waiting you do while you’re in the doctors office.. the type of waiting where you still strive to do your best.. but the end is fairly set in stone… and it’s kind of depressing, it’s as if no matter what you do you’ll end up in the same place.. but i know that isnt the case… it’s a weird feeling

i wish i spoke another language

gary asked me, if ben and i were to get back together if i would be able to let him have his alone time, and i really think that that wouldnt be a problem… give me a chance to start reading again, or something else

ben gives really good back rubs

chris’ back rubs are good.. but not as good as ben’s… i dont think anyone can really compare to the person you’re in love with though

on south park, chef was talking about how god just made himself feel better by giving us things then taking them away… like life, love, happiness… he compared it to giving a kid a lollipop then taking that away, the kid wouldnt be upset if you never gave it to him in the first place….

i really miss mr anderson and mr galbreath

mac commercial

ben again (again)

I could have lived in last night for the rest of my life. Being with Ben again, hearing his voice, having actual conversation with him… it really meant a lot.

… and that back rub he gave me… wow, i really felt like there was something to it. The most amazing feeling as he sat on me and rubbed my back and we talked as gary tried to figure out how to use an ipod…lol

a few more times like that and there is no doubt that we’ll be at least the good friends we once were

it wasnt easy though to not just throw my arms around him the minute i walked in… but i’m glad i didnt, i think it would have slowed things down in the long run.

ready to go

i’ve been home like… 3 days… and i’m already ready to get out of the house again